Tuesday, January 25, 2022

"God, grant..."

(The following is a personal post from one of our group members.)

I really love the concept  of (and experience of) "God, grant..." in our 12 Step recovery program. It shows up in so many forms. I need something God has, and I'm requesting him to give me what I need.

The Serenity Prayer starts out "God, grant...." It then goes on to ask God to give me what I need, but what I don't naturally have in myself. If I already had it, I wouldn't need to ask for it. That's why most of us are praying. We are seeking something from God that we need, including seeking God himself, which actually is our greatest need. 

The ancient root word for "pray" means "ask earnestly, beg, or entreat," That should be what I am doing when I pray, and my inner attitude should align with my earnest request.

I'm thinking about the Third Step Prayer as suggested in the Alcoholics Anonymous book. In that prayer, I ask God to "take away my difficulties,"  and then go on to say "that victory over them may bear witness to Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life." In my early days of going to SA meetings, I was looking for God to take away just enough of my difficulties so that I would be able to handle the rest in my own power. I still wanted to be in charge of my own life, so I only wanted a little boost. I didn't pay attention to the first part of the Third Step Prayer where I would say "God, I offer myself to Thee--to build with me and do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will." And I definitely wasn't approaching God with the bedrock acceptance that I was indeed "powerless over lust". I wanted the power to wield as I saw fit. I wanted the victory to be mine, not his.  Apparently God wasn't interested in that arrangement, hence my many, many years of defeat and slavery to lust. 

It takes humility to "ask earnestly, beg, or entreat" God (or anyone else). I often hear "I'll do it myself" from the lips of little children, and it's sometimes quite amusing to watch what happens next. But for me, the "fun and games" had long-since ended, and the results of years of pride and failure wasn't funny at all. I needed to have a change of heart, to develop a willingness to ask for help and be willing to align my behavior and attitudes with whatever God was willing to grant.  

Thank God that he actually wants me to "succeed". I needed saving. I needed a Power greater than myself that could and would do for me what I couldn't do myself. And I needed the humility to "ask earnestly, beg, and entreat" God to do all of that. And he has.